To breastfeed or not to breastfeed? That is the question...

So who ever said "breastfeeding helps you lose weight" was a liar. They might not have ment to be a liar, but they lied to me. It didn't work when I nursed Trevor and I have now been nursing Jack for 6 months and I'm pretty sure the number on the scale keeps going up. The more I nurse the hungrier I am. 
Sure I might be burning an extra 300-500 calories a day, but when I'm only craving bread, pasta  sugar and salts...that 300-500 calories is used up in one meal.

A little will power you say
hmmm...you must not have ever nursed.
The other day I watched what I ate and only had the calories I should need to breastfeed without losing any weight, and when I pumped I got half the amount of milk I normally do.
Stupid right?
I agree.
It made me angry. My body is against me for some reason.

I have been pregnant or nursing now for 2 years straight, and I want my body to be mine again.
It's sad to say this, because I'm not really done nursing...but I'm done being fat.

Am I being selfish?
Will I regret my decision, because he's my last baby...and once I stop I'll never have that bond again?
Does that sound silly?

It's hard to know...but right now all I can think about is getting back to where I was before I had Trevor and it feels like the longer I wait the harder it's going to be.

My husband is super supportive and tells me to wait until I'm really ready to stop nursing.

what to do, what to do....?